March 13, 2019
by Tricia Osterholm
0 comments
Today I am feeling the loss more deeply. It’s hard to face the reality that another year has gone by without my daughter. The anniversary date stirs up the painful memories of the day we lost Kayln, and it comes flooding back like it was yesterday. Better memories also fill my thoughts today- memories of her smile, her laugh, her kind heart. I hold tightly to these good memories, and though I grieve, I grieve with the hope that I will see her again one day.
February 25, 2019
by Tricia Osterholm
0 comments
If you feel discouraged or defeated by the sorrows and trials of life, there is one who knows your pain and wants to give you peace in the midst of it all. Jesus tells us to take heart, because he has overcome the world. He conquered death and defeated sin for our sake! Not out of obligation but out of love. Trust in the one who loves you with an everlasting love.
January 30, 2019
by Tricia Osterholm
1 Comment
When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. Isaiah 43:2
You may find yourself feeling very alone as you try to cope with a loss. The pain can be overwhelming, and it’s hard to imagine that anyone can understand what you are experiencing. When you are feeling abandoned, hold tight to the truth found in his word. You are not alone – God has promised to be with you as you go through these deep waters. He will hold you up so that you will not succumb to the waves of grief.
December 31, 2018
by Tricia Osterholm
2 Comments
“I lift up my eyes to the mountains— where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip— he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The LORD watches over you— the LORD is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD will keep you from all harm— he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.” Psalm 121: 1-8
As 2019 draws near, I was searching for a verse to hold on to in the year ahead. I have chosen this verse because it is a beautiful reminder that God will continue to watch over me. He is my source of help and my strength, the one I can trust to carry me through whatever may come.
November 29, 2018
by Tricia Osterholm
1 Comment
Yesterday my father-in-law passed away. He was a U.S. Navy Korean War veteran. Though he rarely talked about his military service, he was critically injured and lost vision and hearing for a few days when his ship was fired upon. He said his hearing was never the same.
During this final trip to the Veteran’s hospital, his health was clearly failing and he made the decision to go into their hospice unit. I was amazed at the excellent, compassionate care he received during his last days. The staff was so attentive, willing to go above and beyond for the patient and the family.
After he had passed, the staff made one final gesture to honor his service. As is done with all the veterans after they have died, the staff lined the hallway and saluted as his body was taken down the hall. What a wonderful tribute to honor his service to our country.
October 28, 2018
by Tricia Osterholm
0 comments
What to do with a loved one’s belongings after they have died is a dilemma, and there is no one size fits all solution. It is a very personal process and other people may not understand why it is so hard to part with even the smallest item that person owned. I find that it is not really the possession itself that matters, as much as the memories that are connected to that item.
I have held on to my daughter’s belongings because there is a great amount of fear that is stirred up when I consider letting go of her things. The fear borders on panic – that without that item, that memory will be gone forever. I know it’s not rational, but nothing about dealing with the loss of a child is rational.
Recently I took a small step of parting with a few of Kayln’s possessions. I felt like it was possible to try because of something my son had suggested – just take a picture of the item before you let go. I felt like this would be a good way to store the memories while still letting go of some items. So I gave it a try, and took pictures of a few items, then saved the pictures to a private board on my Pinterest account. I could also put those pictures in a photo album, but this was the quickest way for me to store the photos. Then when I want to reminisce I can easily access the photos and the memories associated with them.
This may not work for everyone, but it is one possible way of handling a difficult and emotional task. When I had done all I could handle for one day, I cried for a long time, but I felt a little better knowing that I could find a way to hold on to the memories.
September 3, 2018
by Tricia Osterholm
2 Comments
Today Kayln would be 24. Looking at her photos makes me feel a little closer to her, but also brings the familiar ache of longing to see her again. How wonderful it would be to hear her laugh, to see her smile. Knowing she is in heaven brings a sense of peace, but I will always wish we had been given more time together. I never could have imagined we would only have 20 years. All I can do now is to focus on the time we did have. As we honor my daughter on her birthday today, we can hold tight to the memories and the joy she brought to our lives.
September 1, 2018
by Tricia Osterholm
0 comments
Jesus promises us peace. But our faith can be shaken when we are faced with devastating news, and peace suddenly seems unattainable. After the loss of a loved one, we can experience profound emptiness and loneliness that can be overwhelming. After the sudden passing of my daughter, the crushing weight of grief was unbearable. Peace seemed impossible as I struggled to cope with the pain.
God created us with emotions and understands the pain we are experiencing, better than anyone around us can. When we feel alone, he is there to listen. We can pour out our hearts to him in prayer, and he never grows tired of hearing from us. We can find great comfort in his word, and meditate on the scriptures throughout the day.
As believers we want to say “not my will but yours be done”, but that does not come easily or automatically. It takes time and effort to reach that point. It is not a linear process; you may take a few steps forward only to find yourself going backwards for a while. You may find that people try to rush you along, or even judge you for not yet having arrived to a place of peace and acceptance.
As I have traveled along this grief journey I have found that without God I will never be at peace. He alone can bring comfort to my heart, just as he promises.
July 30, 2018
by Tricia Osterholm
0 comments
How full is your calendar? Do you get anxious when you think about the upcoming week? Don’t overlook the importance of intentionally scheduling time for rest and relaxation. Time spent in rest may be considered a luxury, but in reality it’s needed for maintaining good health and balance in our lives.
God invites us to find rest in Him. While there are many good ways to relax, the best form of rest is found through spending time with the Lord. When you set aside time for prayer and Bible study, and seek His direction for your life, He can refresh your spirit and give you strength for each day.
June 30, 2018
by Tricia Osterholm
0 comments
Distressful times will come.
In those moments, we discover our own strength to be inadequate. Other people fail us, for we all have weaknesses. Death may separate us from our loved ones that we once relied on. We feel alone, and hopelessness can set in. Yet there is one who has proven himself to be trustworthy to carry us through the trials of life – God, who has abundant grace to cover us, shield us and carry us through. He has provided a Savior who wants to help us through each day. When the storms come, He is the One and Only who can help us overcome. He wants to be our source of strength.
All we have to do is ask.
